I am very clumsy. Period.

I, Jenie Gabriel, offically admit that I have a serious case of clumsiness. And I'm not proud of it, at all.

Here are some proofs:

Within the last 2 months, I...

1) tripped badly while walking to GB3 with my officemate. If I wasn't able to grab his arm, I think I would've lost a tooth.

2) broke a bottle of unopened SanMig Light into pieces while we're at JM's house. I accidentally dropped the lid of the cooler on top of the beer.

3) tripped while walking back to the office after having lunch with 6 of my male officemates. Take note: I was wearing rubber shoes.

4) felt accountable when our new oval mirror in the condo fell on the floor, and shattered into bits after I shut the bathroom door. Seven years of bad luck? Whatever, damn it.

5) spilled soy sauce with sili and onion on my boss' plastic bag while we were eating kwek-kwek & tokwa in a Jollijeep yesterday.

6) accidentally pushed the menu of Krocodile Grille into their fountain. I tried to save it from drowning so the waiters won't see it submerged, but I failed.

7) felt stupid when my cellphone fell straight into the garbage bin a while ago. I was charging it when the cord got caught on my chair's wheels as I screamed "Ay kalabaw!" for all my officemates to hear and laugh about. Good thing the trash can was empty.

8) moved my chair again, and my phone plummeted on the cold cement (yes there aren't tiles) of the office, as my officemates go "Naku!" and "Tsk.. Tsk..."

9) tripped after paying my lunch bill a while ago. The waiters saw me, of course.

10) felt horrible because after I finally admitted my condition, the pencil I was holding flew 2 feet away from me, in the middle of a brainstorming session.

11) slipped while getting out of the elevator just minutes before I wrote this entry.

Okay that's enough. I feel even worse typing all these. I don't mean to humiliate myself or destroy property. It just happens all of a sudden, and I really can't help it. I'm poise-less and I don't know the meaning of the word 'graceful'. It would probably take more than 10 John Robert Powers sessions to remedy this. I just really have a hard time not being clumsy, because I really don't do it on purpose.

It gets frustrating and I really don't know what to do sometimes. Yes, knowing and admitting maybe half the battle, but prevention is better than cure.

So... how the hell do I prevent these from happening???

I have no f*&*@^% idea!!! UGH ;-S