Why?

why is this my 3rd post of the day?
haay. I asked for raffy's help regarding this stupid employment situation. i dunno. most people want to be employed, because they're getting bored and all. pero ako, i don't see anything good with being employed. aside from the fact that i get paid every 15 days. Wala lang. It's not that easy eh. it sucks having bosses observe and scrutinize your every move as if you're a f*ng fish in an aquarium. It sucks having someone ask you what you're working on every time. Well, i guess i'm on my pessimistic mode again. Wala lang. I'm planning to leave. As if that's gonna solve anything, but what the heck. i just know i want to. I'll just follow my instincts.

October 5, 2004 10:49 AM "Consider this, any more fuck ups on ----(client's name), i will be expecting your resignation letter the following week"

Then so be it. And I only made a damn mistake in a client presentation draft. The more annoying thing is that the client didn't even notice it, and I didn't even know what I did was wrong. Grammar was right, there wasn't any typo errors either. Naiba lang ung position ng isang prepositional phrase ok?!?! same parin nmn ung meaning nung copy. Putcha anlabo. I guess ang malas ko natiming sa "mali" ko ung outburst nya. Bwiset. Ung artist kaya ung tambak na ang kapalpakan. At ung sa kanya, naprint na ng hundreds of thousands of copies noh! Eh ako sa draft lang ung "mali", tapos tinext na ko! Haay naku. as if it will make me feel better nna dalawa kaming tinext. bwiset tlga. Sarap ipabugbog. Arrogant ass. But what can I do, this world is full of them. As if I didn't know that. Arrgghhh. I'm still pissed. Malamang dahil ma-pride ako. Ewan. Self-preservation lang noh. Syempre normal naman siguri reaction and response ko. Sabi nila, don't resign right away. Ung advice sakin na isa, resign after I've done something good. Have I even done something remarkable that past 2 months? i dunno. Praises don't exist in this company. They only see your faults. So how do I know if I've done something "great"? I have no idea. Who makes a mistake intentionally anyway? Da hell. I'm glad there are supportive people around me. It sucks when you're threatened to be fired when you're already thinking twice about leaving and becoming a bum once again. I wanna be a bum. I'll just rest for a while, then get back to work again. I've been applying anyway. This time, I'll see to it that I'm ready and fully motivated when i work. I won't just be going with the flow, and get a job for the sake of it. This time I'll be more hardworking and persistent. I'll take all the bullshit as challenges. I'll make sure I'll be more proactive. Haha. Preachy. Shet. Why don't I just do these now? Why wait for another employer to torment me before I start with the reformation? Ah ewan. Grrr. I'll just edit my resume and cover letter tonight. Ugh. Can I just get paid while job hunting? I love doing it anyway. It feels good being sought. haha! weirdo. Pisces tlga ko. "Only up for the thrill of the chase." hehe double meaning. But it's true. I'm having a hard time "committing" to a job. It's either I get bored easily, or I resort to a better one. This is my 2nd job, by the way and soon, I'm off to my third. God-willing, I'll stick to that one. What's wrong with me? This is bad. Not committing to something is not good at all. I don't know why i can't commit to a freaking job, that's supposedly my "dream" already. I think I simply can't commit, man. No wonder I've been single since birth. Bwahahahaha ang labo...